22 July 2011

A Lonestar Farewell

Texas, I love you. You are one of the many places I call home.

This is where we came into our own as a married couple. We moved away, 1600 miles from the nearest family member. Our traditions were our own to create. We struggled. We clung to each other during a desperate time of infertility. We found a happiness together that the first three years of our marriage could not match.

This is where we started our family. First our Jonas, then our Mimi. Two angels sent directly to us.

This is where I learned to be a mother. That I am a softer person than I could have ever imagined. That my heart is in the right place. That I am not very good at it yet, but that my children know they are loved and that I can experience joy in the mundane, menial, daily acts of family life.

This is where I really started to see my priorities for what they were. What was important. Where I needed to simplify. That I would never be able to do it all and that's okay. That preparing every needful thing is not the same as preparing everything. Needful is not as much as I thought.

This is where we learned life isn't fair. It's a chaotic dynamic of everyone's choices affecting everyone around them. A challenge in mental fortitude, to be sure, but an exhilarating one.

This is where we embraced our health, first learning I had an uncurable autoimmune disorder, then conquering that so-called uncurable disorder. Where we took steps to heal ourselves physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally.

This is where we embarked upon adulthood. Started careers, ended careers, went through a 10-month period of unemployment, worked on a start-up business, faced tax issues and insurance issues and retirement issues, bought a house and an investment property, short sold a house and an investment property, lived in 7 different places. Spent months (and years) searching for the perfect doctors, perfect farms/co-ops, perfect family activities, perfect babysitters, perfect accountants, perfect investment managers, perfect chocolate shops, perfect fajitas... and succeeded in finding them all.

This is where we found best friends, learned about human nature, lost best friends, discovered who we wanted to keep in our lives forever, and discovered who felt the same way about us.

This is where we created our life together. A very beautiful life.

And yet, Texas is where my family will never be.

So we moved.

Goodbye Texas. You will always have the sweetest of places in my heart.

Hello Utah. You have my family, and therefore, my heart.