28 May 2009

Yeah, I get it

I visited with an infant nutrition consultant today because Jonas is below the 5th percentile in weight and length for a 9-month-old. (12 months: 17.5 pounds, 26 inches long)
Consultant: So it says here that you exclusively breastfeed. How is your supply?

Me: It's fine.

Consultant: (glances at my chest) Are you sure about that? You don't look like you're producing an adequate amount.

Me: Um........

Consultant: Because most women who breastfeed are significantly bigger than you.

Me: (mumbles) I'm wearing a sports bra.

Consultant: Hmmm (writes notes).

Dear Life

Thanks to Becca for the idea.

Dear Blog,

Should I change your domain name? We're not really patandjen.blogspot.com anymore. That would require a contribution from The Pat. More like jennifer-loves-reading-her-own-thoughts-and-narcissisticly-believes-others-wait-with-baited-breath-to-do-the-same.blogspot.com. I'm just saying.



Dear HOA,

Can we open the pool in March and close in October. Not a question. More of a statement, really. It's 90 degrees after all. Why wait until Memorial Day and close at Labor Day?


Sweating in Spring

Dear Thighs,

I know we've been together for a good 12 years, but our relationship is diminishing. I know you have worked so diligently at helping me retain my pear shape. But if we can set aside the social norms and be honest with one another, I'm not really into the pear shape. It is more fitting for, well, pears. Please don't be surprised when you look in the mirror one morning and realize half of you is missing.

Your Other Half

Dear Property Taxes,

If I am a teacher, can I be exempt?



Dear Jodee at Wal-Mart,

Yes, I am really buying that many cans. No, there is not a hurricane approaching.


3 month supply

Dear Down Comforter,

I love you I love you I love you.


Mrs. Perpetually 96.2º

Dear Magic Bullet,

You are my favorite appliance, but please don't tell the Whirly Pop or the Wondermill. They have no idea they have fallen out of favor. Just in case of mutiny, you will be residing in different cabinets.


Dear Member's Mark Diapers,

Never again.


Huggies Patron

26 May 2009

Photo Shoot with the Twins

My blogging sabbaticals are getting out of control. Here's an easy post of what we've been doing.

10 May 2009

For Me This is Heaven

A lull in Jonas' activity level is my first clue that it is nap time. I carry him to his room and stand next to the Pack 'n Play. The moment I stick the pacifier in his mouth, he lays his head on my shoulder with his hand on my chest or collarbone, sometimes with eyes shut, and sighs peacefully. I hold him close for as long as I dare, not wanting to let go of my sweet angel. As I lay him down, he begins to twist the pacifier in his mouth, grinning contentedly. He positions himself in a spread eagle stance while I tuck the blanket around him, and talks himself to sleep. We do this three times each day. And three times each day, I know I'm touching heaven.

Happy Mother's Day.

09 May 2009

Guess who's getting married

The blushing bride.

Such a gorgeous veil!

There's excitement in the air

Congratulations Michelle and Nels!

04 May 2009

I am a real woman seeking a real computer savvy companion.

About Me. Let's see. I love long walks on the beach, dinners by candlelight, and kissing in the rain. I love life and am always up for a new adventure. I am willing to try just about anything, lol.

Currently Seeking. I am a visual learner who is completely fed up with the standard recipe scene. I need a new format that understands me and is there for me through thick and thin. I detest reading through the directions and then being forced to go back up to find out the quantities to mix, whisk, blend, fold, and combine. I want to type out my recipes, but just haven't found the right one...the one that will keep me warm by the oven. I have just been wasting my time on 5x7 notecards until my dream format comes along. If you know how to format your text like this, let's meet up. It could be the beginnings of a beautiful relationship. And if it doesn't last, we'll sure have fun trying!

(Seriously, does anyone know how to type a recipe out like this? It would make my life a million times easier and my recipe blog exponentially more effective.)

01 May 2009

Patrick 3, Jennifer 0

Number of times Jonas has fallen off the bed or couch under the watchful eye of aforementioned parent.